Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
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Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
There's always time for handjobs
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Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
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