Christians are straight up FREAKS
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
