Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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