Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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