you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Randomize
