when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Randomize
