I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
i've created a new STD.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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