mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
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