He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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