it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
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