What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
