If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
no you cant smoke seaweed
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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