the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
