Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Blood and glitter go together right?
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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