I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize
