how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
