well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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