he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize
