You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
We talked him into tasing himself.
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
