i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
Randomize
