please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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