i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
