I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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