i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
