Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
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I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
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Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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