I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize