I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize