His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
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