I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Randomize
