Little spoons don't ask big questions
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
