Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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