Moan for me like Helen Keller
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize