You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
Randomize
