worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Randomize
