are you so shy because you have an std?
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Randomize
