Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Randomize
