Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
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