I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
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