Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
i drank out of a bidet.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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