Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
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