is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Randomize
