whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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