the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Randomize
