I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
