Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
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