It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Randomize
