Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
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