yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
3 2 1 whiskey
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
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