i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
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