UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Randomize
