You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
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